MY DAUGHTER IS MY FRIEND
Let me start this post by saying, I have an AMAZING relationship with my mother. My mother is my best friend. I can call her and tell her anything: vent, cry, laugh, and be real with her. It has always been that way. And yes, even during my teenage years I have always had a great relationship with my mother. I don’t think I ever got into a fight with my mom or disrespected her. We have always been close. So the type of mother/daughter bond that I have with my mother is the same kind of bond that I want with Aria as she grows into an adult.
To be honest, 4 years ago when I found out I was pregnant, I wanted SO BAD to have a boy. Ernest and I just knew we were going to have a little boy. His name was picked out and everything. But that didn’t happen. God blessed us with a beautiful baby girl, Aria Danielle Bolden and I couldn’t be more happy to have this little girl in my life. From the moment she was placed in my arms, I knew I wanted to have a bond with my daughter just like the bond I have with my mother.
Words can’t describe Aria. She is literally unlike any child you will ever meet. She is insanely smart, energetic, FUNNY as HELL, caring, sweet and simply put, Aria. She is the best thing that has happened to me and I am so blessed to be her mom.
Aria and I have an amazing relationship. I want to build the friendship and support that my mother built in me into her. I want Aria to know that no matter what, I will ALWAYS be there for her and have her best interest. Although I consider Aria a friend, don’t get it twisted; I will still check her when necessary, put her little butt in time-out, or have a stern conversation with her. And later, kiss and hug her like nothing happened. She will always get the real from me, but still, know that I love her with every ounce of my heart. This is exactly how it is with my mom. She will get me all the way together and I will never hold a grudge, or be angry. We will just move pass the “read” and be back like normal lol.
So for any new moms, soon to be moms, or moms looking to strengthen their relationship with their child; my number one tip to building a great relationship at a young age is to be present. Often times as a busy mom, sometimes we prioritize all of the work before home. And I have to admit, I fall victim to this sometimes. But it is always so important to ensure our child is first priority.
So this means, as tired as I am from work, when Aria walks in that door from daycare or when I pick her up, I have a new found energy. I play with her, I laugh with her, I find time to play dress-up, or read with her. These little moments are what they remember most and will strengthen that bond. And for the mothers that have older children, it is never too late to rekindle or strengthen that friendship. Whether they are away at college or have their own house and career- be present. Check in, find that time for them.
I know as Aria grow older, I won’t always be her bestie, she will have her friends from school or sports team, but I want her to know that I will always be there for her-always.